Today as I drove to take K to school, I couldn’t help but think of the influences she encounters every single day. Like…every day. And ALL the influences that are thrown at her. And as we discussed some behavior that I had come across on social media from young girls, I couldn’t help from wondering if I was doing a “good enough”job at this whole Mom thing. Have I instilled in her the right values? Have I set the right example? Have I raised her to be confident, strong, and respectful of herself and others? Or have I dropped the ball and totally flunked out of Motherhood? Jesus take the wheel! Please, like for real!
I would be lying to you if I said that I have never yelled at my kids, said words that weren’t very “lady-like,” acted in ways that didn’t mirror the attitude of Christ, or that I have never been “extra” as K would put it. Because, I have. I have allowed my emotions to get the best of me in moments. I have blurted out phrases and words that I later wished I could retract. I have succumbed to my flesh at times, and I have been the “Queen of Extra” in moments. No, I don’t always get it right. No, I am not the perfect Mother. And by no means do I have all the answers. But what I do know is that I know the ONE who holds everything. I know the ONE who does have all the answers. He can create in me a new heart. He can renew my mindset. He can carry me when I can’t carry myself. And He carries K. My mind is put at ease when I remember this truth. He formed her in my womb and knew her before I even knew of her.
And with that being said, as K and I continued our conversation this morning on appropriate versus inappropriate behavior, Kari Jobe’s album The Garden played in the background. I shared with K my thoughts of how young girls need more role models like Kari Jobe than Niki Minaj. And as she stepped out of the car I yelled as I have begun to make a habit of recently, “Be the joy of heaven that you are!”
Our daughters need more teaching on their value and worth in Christ. We need to be speaking over them the identity given to them through Christ, and that their identity is found in Him alone. Their value and worth is found in Him alone. We need to model this truth for ourselves, as well, so that they don’t just hear our words but they see us living it out. They need to see the confidence of Christ within us. It’s okay for our daughters not to be the most popular. It’s okay for our daughters not to have boyfriends. It’s okay for our daughters to not go to parties. All of that stuff doesn’t amount to anything of eternal value. It’s not okay, however, for our daughters to not know who Jesus is. It’s not okay for our daughters to not know that their value, worth, and identity are found in Jesus and not in some relationship or social status. And it’s not okay for us as their Mothers to excuse behavior that reflects this world and not the Kingdom (for ourselves and for them).
Again, I am by no means the perfect Mother (and I am sure my kids would tell you that), but I don’t want to be the Mother who sits back while her daughter is searching. I want to be the Mother who speaks heaven’s truths over her daughter (and sons) and does her best to offer the influences of the Kingdom for her daughter to have.
Oh, sweet Jesus, help us to influence our daughters for Your Kingdom so that they can be the daughters of God that You have created them to be. In Jesus’ name, AMEN.